Gotcha Day

July, 18^th 2012… Will forever be known in our family as Anderson’s Gotcha Day.

We spent the morning straightening up the room, grocery shopping for food he might like, and trying to relax/rest before the big change.

We have been waiting so long for this day to come, but as the elevator climbed to the 6^th floor I was filled with a heart-thumping combination of excitement and anxiety.  Of course I was longing to have Anderson in my arms and call him ours, but I knew that this transition would not be easy for him and that the tears would flow. 

Each day he has gotten more comfortable playing with us in the playroom of SWS.  Today in walked right in and started playing with us.  We didn’t have long with him before he had to go to his final doctor’s check up (the first couple floors of the SWS building are part of a hospital).  Well the visit confirmed what we already knew.  We have a really healthy boy; he is 27 pounds!  Ms. Kim gave us our necessary paper work, foster mom gave us some snacks and food that he loves to eat (eternally grateful for that!), and the agency gave us 2 books about Seoul and SWS, formula and diapers.  Before we left, the director of SWS came to meet us and gave us a beautiful gift (a mother of pearl jewelry box.)  Then it was time to leave.  If it had been up to us this part would have happened differently but it was not up to us.  Ms. Kim told us it was time to leave.  We all walked to the elevator (foster mom was still holding Anderson.)  You could see she was having a hard time letting him go.  She shifted him on her hip several times.  There were tears.  Andy and I were forcing ourselves to remain calm so to not further upset Anderson.  Then Anderson was handed to Andy and we got on the elevator to leave.  Anderson cried as we were on the elevator, but once we were outside he was distracted from crying by looking around.  However, once we were inside our room, he was crying inconsolably.  Andy was sweating terribly and needed to change clothes so he handed Anderson to me.  I felt so helpless.  I could sympathize with his tears but I wanted so badly to make them stop.  His head and eyes kept scanning the room looking for foster mom.  It felt like an eternity, but in reality it was only 18 minutes.  Oh yes I timed it.  And like a light switch had been flipped, hid eyes fluttered and he feel asleep in my arms.  I walked over to the bed and we rested together.  He slept and I soaked in the moment of having my son sleep in my arms for the first time.  He slept for a little over an hour, but when he woke, the tears came again.  We decided to brave the stares and headed outside.  He does not cry when we are out and walking around.  Union Street here we come!  He eventually fell asleep in the ergo baby.  After our walk we had dinner (rice and pumpkin).  He is doing so well with the bonding.  Each hour we see improvements in his willingness to be with us.  After dinner we took a quick bath.  We played in the room a little longer, but when he started to get fussy we headed back outside for another walk.  On this walk we felt like we had two major bonding successes.  1.  He started making silly faces back at us.  He has two silly faces that he alternates between.  Face #1 is a scrunched up nose that you would make if something stinks.  Face #2 is the chin extended down but the lips kept together like you are surprised.  Making these faces back and forth while we walked earned us our first smile of the day.  2.  We have been calling ourselves mommy and daddy and sometimes using the Korean words for mom and dad when referring to each other and ourselves.  While we were walking Andy was talking to Anderson and telling him to say “Daddy”.  Much to our surprise and delight, Anderson pointed to Andy and said “Appa” (the Korean word for Daddy! Mommy might be a little slower coming since that is what he called foster mom, but if we are here already we know it won’t be long.  At 8pm he started yawning again.  He usually goes to sleep at 10pm, but we decided not to fight it.  Andy and Anderson played with a musical toy we bought while here as I showered.  We were told he likes things that make noise.  Well he is in luck because so many friends have given us electric toys that we should have more than enough to keep him occupied.   At about 8:30 Andy gave him a bottle and curled down beside him in the bed, and by 9pm he was sleeping like a champ.  The bed is not big enough for the three of us even is the best sleeping conditions.  The plan was for me to shower and then come sleep there, but after my shower I peaked in the room and both my boys were sleeping so soundly I could not bear the thought of moving Andy.  At about 11pm, Andy woke up and we switched places.  Then we switched places again at about 4am.  Like I said these are not the best sleeping conditions.  The beds are rock hard, and neither of us has slept through the night since last Thursday when we left Concord at 4am to go to the airport.  It is now 7:40 AM, and Anderson is still sleeping.  What a blessing to have such a good sleeper!   

It is pouring rain this morning thanks to a tropical storm to our east in the Yellow Sea, so today is going to be interesting since walking might be more of a challenge, but thanks to a good night’s sleep we are up to the challenge. 

Love to you all!  Andy, Kate and Anderson.